grayestofghosts | Still Looking For The Good Internet

I'm still alive. I am behind on my reading, and should still make posts on the last two books I've read and not done anything about (Harrow the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir and Yield Under Great Persuasion by Alexandra Rowland). I guess in the interim I've read fanfic and Frieren, which is fine, I guess, but not the same as reading.

There's just... a lot of bad things going on around me and not all of them are online, and I keep thinking about how things used to be better, but I do not know where those good things are. And honestly I'm a different person than I was then, so now I need different things, just in time for everything to feel so closed off.

Getting into stuff like vaporwave, messing with computers, etc., all feel like distractions and while I get that distractions are necessary to an extent I am not sure what would even be fulfilling. I am tempted to try to get into zine space but I think my confidence is an issue. I have been writing consistently (even if it's only one sentence a day, I've at least been touching the current WIP every day), and I think my new year's resolution will be to have a finished draft. But overall I don't really feel good. And I don't really know what to do.

When I look at the small web stuff it is interesting and there is a big dream there but right now it feels insufficiently social right now. Perhaps I am looking at the wrong places.